I hate this movie. Words cannot describe how much I detestPeter Jackson's adaptation of Alice Sebold's novel The Lovely
Bones. Sir, how dare you? How dare you? How dare you! Mr.
Jackson, you are not allowed to manipulate me in such a callous,
slick and blase way. How do I hate this movie? Let me count the
ways...
I have been the victim of maudlin movie manipulation before.
Some of the best loved movies of our times tug shamelessly
at our emotions, coaxing tears from our ducts and "aw"s from
at our emotions, coaxing tears from our ducts and "aw"s from
our collective throats. Ghost, Terms of Endearment, Forrest
Gump, Steel Magnolias, Wuthering Heights, Titantic, Kramer
Vs. Kramer, Beaches, Ordinary People, Bambi, for crissakes,
all wallow in mawkish, life-affirming sentimentality, wringing
Gump, Steel Magnolias, Wuthering Heights, Titantic, Kramer
Vs. Kramer, Beaches, Ordinary People, Bambi, for crissakes,
all wallow in mawkish, life-affirming sentimentality, wringing
us with wrenching emotion but making us feel better as we
sniffle our way out of the theater.
sniffle our way out of the theater.
What is most offensive about The Lovely Bones is that Peter
Jackson lards the profoundly awful circumstance of Bones,
Jackson lards the profoundly awful circumstance of Bones,
a lovely duckling of a young girl (Saoirse Ronan) is raped
and murdered on the precipice of promising womanhood by a
chillingly banal murderer (Stanley Tucci), with all the five-
hankie accouterments - the dotty, booze swilling grandmother
(Susan Sarandon), the impossibly cute mop-headed little brother
(Christian Thomas Ashdale), the plucky also-dead girl guide
(Nikki SooHoo), the misty-eyed boyfriend (Reece Ritchie) -
without leavening the the profoundly awful circumstances one
whit.
and murdered on the precipice of promising womanhood by a
chillingly banal murderer (Stanley Tucci), with all the five-
hankie accouterments - the dotty, booze swilling grandmother
(Susan Sarandon), the impossibly cute mop-headed little brother
(Christian Thomas Ashdale), the plucky also-dead girl guide
(Nikki SooHoo), the misty-eyed boyfriend (Reece Ritchie) -
without leavening the the profoundly awful circumstances one
whit.
Bones is relentlessly cold and matter-of-fact, full of "just the
facts ma'am" hokum as it devolves into an wholly unsatisfactory
mishmash of police procedural and "Hello God, this is Susie"
candy-coated aphorisms. Jackson exhibits the same ham-
handed technical proficiency he did in King Kong where his big
lumbering gorilla walked and breathed but could not coax an
iota of the deep emotion the shaggy, stop action puppet elicited
from us in the original. Both big hairy apes die atop the Empire
State Building but only once do we care.
It is as if Jackson were tone deaf to audience's needs. He seems
facts ma'am" hokum as it devolves into an wholly unsatisfactory
mishmash of police procedural and "Hello God, this is Susie"
candy-coated aphorisms. Jackson exhibits the same ham-
handed technical proficiency he did in King Kong where his big
lumbering gorilla walked and breathed but could not coax an
iota of the deep emotion the shaggy, stop action puppet elicited
from us in the original. Both big hairy apes die atop the Empire
State Building but only once do we care.
It is as if Jackson were tone deaf to audience's needs. He seems
infinitely more interested in the obsessive details of the victim's
meticulous father (Mark Wahlberg) placing ships inside bottles
or the obsessively detailed notebooks of the creepy murderer
than he is in conveying simple human emotion. There is some
business with a baseball bat. It is employed. But it is the audience
that is pummeled.
~(no)rave!
meticulous father (Mark Wahlberg) placing ships inside bottles
or the obsessively detailed notebooks of the creepy murderer
than he is in conveying simple human emotion. There is some
business with a baseball bat. It is employed. But it is the audience
that is pummeled.
~(no)rave!
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